Sunday, April 10, 2005

Estancia Fun!

Yesterday was a blast! We went to the Estancia Arteaga for a day and it was so fun! We had a total of about 5 hours of riding, bfast, asado for lunch, mirienda,dancing, music, and we got to play with a wild tarantula! Craziness! Today Haley and I were planning on a day long beach relaxation.. but we went for an hour and it started sprinkling.. so now I am condemned to homework.. yuck.. oh well..

Topic of conversation on the two hour van rides yesterday:

- corny ways we have been "asked out" in high school, middle school etc,
- prom invitations/assumtions/activities
- dumb breakups.... mostly "worst" stories
- he said- she said middle school conversations
- embarrassing moments


its amazing the things that can define you, change you, loosen you up a bit... As much as I don't miss all the drama of high school.. I appreciate how much I learned from it. I think I came out ahead... I don't feel tarnished by a crappy high school experience, despite painful days, weeks, months.. and uncomfortable situations. Bad decisions ended up opening my eyes to so much of the world, and so much of who I was and want to be.

It always reminds me of how lucky I am to have been able to go through the experiences I have. I am not jealous of the rich, or the families who "grew up in church" or anybody who has never "lost" anyone. I am not jealous of people who haven't experienced anything traumatizing or painful. I feel bad for what they have missed out on. I am not trashing those groups of people. I know many in each category who are wiser than I could ever hope to be.

Brooke for example is someone I have so much respect for. She has had great life, but lived it... and she is wiser for it. She has her head on straight and it didn't have to get knocked around to get there... You are a blessed girl and Im proud to be your friend.

Then there are the people whom I have sympathy for. Daniel was one. Ive talked to him about it before. He has had a relatively easy life and knows it. Christian family, happy home, normal siblings, good highschool, good friends, never really had to persevere through much. (Daniel you know Im not doggin ya. youre a great guy, we've had this convo before:P) Yet with the amount of blessings he has he missed a lot as well. I remember him saying he felt like he was never pushed into finding himself cuz he just never had anything to face. That sucks. Im not saying I hope people die around him, or whatever.. but I hope that he will have to face obstacles soo that God can open his eyes to who he is.. for his sake. Not saying he's a big fat jerk and I wish he would see that. Not saying that! I do mean that he deserves to be able to struggle with God a little, not against, but beside God. The "pure joy whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."(James 1:2-4). Man I love that verse. I feel like it represents a lot of me. My hope is that I can be come complete through trials. That in every trial I can see which part of me is being molded, or atleast trust that it is happening whether I see it or not. It makes the rough times bearable, and it makes this world a lot easier to live it.

Anyway.. That is my thought train of the day. I seem to be thinking about this a lot. Throughout life this verse and verses like it come back to me. I wonder why :P

Love to all

2 comments:

Julie said...

i have felt the same way about my life sometimes, because it seems that when some sort of trial does arise, i can only concentrate on how unfair it seems, and i take my good life for granted. i love my blessings of a christian family and an easy life, but it won't always be so simple and then i am afraid i'll fall apart.

i miss you and i wish you were here so we could lay out and read magazines! i am praying for your summer plans!

Brooke said...

Wow. Thanks for the nice things you said about me. I can't even tell you how much respect I have for you. I am incredibly thankful to have had such a blessed life, but sometimes I almost get jealous of those people who have had a few more bumps in the road, because I am convinced that trials strengthen faith. Something I've been struggling with a LOT lately is figuring out my own faith. Not my parents' faith, not the faith of the church I grew up in, but my own, personal, real faith. It's not easy, and it's definitely been challenging for me. Anyway, I think you're awesome and I miss you immensely. Come back to us Phyllis!!