Thursday, April 09, 2009

Freaking out.

I am stressed out. I am freakingout that it is nearly easter, I have tooons of work to do and I am struggling with focus. I have a cold sore again.. and I have reasoned that it is recurring because I botched my latest good work on changing my diet. I spent a good month recalibrating my system to eat well, be active and drink loots of water. Then I stressed out, and started back on my sugar diet it. Now I feel like crap, i'm exhausted with no focus and this blasted cold sore stops me from eating anything worthwhile anyway. arg. On top of that I am feeling uber irrational. I flip flop between sending emails of my verbal emotional vomit to different people in my life I convince myself need to know exactly how I feel or how their every word makes me feel.. getting my tongue pierced again.. ditching work to go to Abilene... and sitting on my butt eating brownies and watching heroes til my eyes bleed because I have no clue where to go to finish my paper. I feel so confused and lost in all of this crap that I don't know what to do other than just make a drastic change. So I'm going to try. Starting tomorrow I am going to attempt to do as many of the things on my list below:

Drink two liters of water
Go running.
Go to Corner Bakery and write.
Go to First Baptist to try and get my insurance money.
Eat 2 pieces of fruit and one vegetable whole and fresh.
Not sleep til noon.
Lay out in the sun for 30 minutes.
Play guitar for 30 min.
Read my daily devotion.
Not have soda.
Call my mom or sister.
Go to bed by midnight, sleep no more than 8 hours.
Not spend a dime.

1 comment:

Brooke said...

I'm sorry you're freaking out! I wish I could be there or do something! You can always put me on your list of people to call if you want. Love you girl! Hang in there!